D & A

 We had learned together that we hide our true self because we are afraid of being vulnerable. We are afraid that we do not match the social standards of health, wealth, beauty and many other frames that the society bounded us in. Read more about it here : Tear OFF your hiding mask. Moreover, we push our loved ones inside these frames. My baby started walking or talking at an early age. My child is the top of his class in needless education. My partner is the most romantic, powerful, caring, beautiful and so on. The strange part is that we try to match ourselves to all the society norms even the negative parts of it. We turn grayed hair at a  certain age and we start speaking about the age related illnesses and amount of pills we take daily. The positive norms that help us like meditating, fitness exercises, and reading are selected by some people also as a way to gain the society acceptance by being within the norm.  We need to be ourselves. But we need to be conscious i...

HI, in our previous chat we had explained what we need to think about the YES and the NO . Moreover, we talked about when we retract from saying an explicit NO. You can revert back to out chat here:  Say No, Even without a voice or a gesture. Today, we shall explore more on the NO. But this time we will talk about situation when we don't catch that a NO is needed. This usually happens when we are not fully aware of the situation we are in. This happens when: We don't consider that this subject will affect us We are in the autopilot mode The later is the easier to explain so we shall start chatting about. Do we have an autopilot mode? Yes, And, it is very important to our safety and everyday life in many ways. Many of our reactions to an emergency situation are auto responses as when we press the car brakes, step aside, lower our head or quickly move our hand from a hot surface. If you think about any of these situations you can't really tell how this action was initiated an...

Well, it seems a little bit weird, If no no one is going to hear me saying NO, to whom should I say NO??? or, why should I say it in the first place??? We need to answer Two (2) questions: Why we say No? Why we won't explicitly say it in some situations?  Why we say NO? We say No as a reply or as a reaction. As a reply we say it in return of Can you..? Would you...? Do you....? Are you....? The last two questions are interrogative i.e. trying to pull some information from you or imposing some answers. When you are aware of the question and have some feeling toward its intention, then you take a deep breath, create a gap and then, try to figure out the best answer.  The other time we say NO is when we express our astonishment that is coming from our disbelieve. Some quickly NO shots are part of our defense mechanism. A Yes, is not an easy answer even. It implies a commitment or a declaration. However, You can make it conditional to create an escape as when you say: Yes, but, wh...